Post by cjm on Jun 28, 2015 16:51:24 GMT
www.theonion.com/graphic/timeline-mass-extinction-50749
Scientists predict that human activity has put the world on the brink of the sixth mass extinction in earth’s history, an event characterized by the elimination of a large number of species within a very short period of time. Here is a timeline of extinction events over the planet’s history:
450 million years ago: First Extinction: A bunch of dumb fish die
450 million years ago-360 million years ago: Pretty smooth sailing, all things considered
360 million years ago: Second Extinction: Following the eradication of 96 percent of all life, planet’s surviving bacteria really living it up
250 million years ago: Third Extinction: Despite dire warnings of many within the scientific community, increasingly alarming assertions that another mass extinction could be imminent are largely ignored by dinosaur community
205 million years ago: Fourth Extinction: End of winged crocodile species that would have blown your xxxxing mind
65 million years ago: Fifth Extinction: Last living dinosaur on earth walks around confusedly for a few days before falling into a ravine
20 million years ago: God dies
1500 BCE: First inkling human beings might be plowing through every single species in path
1992 CE: Kyoto Protocol tossed into path of oncoming extinction
2010 CE: British Petroleum announces yearly earnings of $29.5 billion
2015 CE: Town of Stonington, CT holds little recycling drive
2200 CE: Sixth Extinction: Centuries of unchecked human activity wipe out 99.9 percent of all remaining species on earth; flora and fauna who are free from sin ascend to heaven
2200 CE-800 million CE: Horseshoe crab racked with survivor’s guilt
Scientists predict that human activity has put the world on the brink of the sixth mass extinction in earth’s history, an event characterized by the elimination of a large number of species within a very short period of time. Here is a timeline of extinction events over the planet’s history:
450 million years ago: First Extinction: A bunch of dumb fish die
450 million years ago-360 million years ago: Pretty smooth sailing, all things considered
360 million years ago: Second Extinction: Following the eradication of 96 percent of all life, planet’s surviving bacteria really living it up
250 million years ago: Third Extinction: Despite dire warnings of many within the scientific community, increasingly alarming assertions that another mass extinction could be imminent are largely ignored by dinosaur community
205 million years ago: Fourth Extinction: End of winged crocodile species that would have blown your xxxxing mind
65 million years ago: Fifth Extinction: Last living dinosaur on earth walks around confusedly for a few days before falling into a ravine
20 million years ago: God dies
1500 BCE: First inkling human beings might be plowing through every single species in path
1992 CE: Kyoto Protocol tossed into path of oncoming extinction
2010 CE: British Petroleum announces yearly earnings of $29.5 billion
2015 CE: Town of Stonington, CT holds little recycling drive
2200 CE: Sixth Extinction: Centuries of unchecked human activity wipe out 99.9 percent of all remaining species on earth; flora and fauna who are free from sin ascend to heaven
2200 CE-800 million CE: Horseshoe crab racked with survivor’s guilt